The Pain in My Brain

Copyright ©1992 John Wm Beckner - All Rights Reserved

A reverberating CRESCENDO destroys the silence
Of my senses I’ve no more RELIANCE
Spots and FLASHES, my eyes glaze over
You’d think it was a bad HANGOVER

An attention seeker is all you are
In a fake reality show, you’d be the star

No one understands, is this REAL?
PAIN and NAUSEA are all I feel
All around, too LOUD, too BRIGHT
Help me, God, how do I FIGHT?

Go away, we’ve got no time
You’re just depressed, it’s such a crime

But drinking I stopped 10 years ago
This PAIN in my BRAIN is my new cargo
Trying ANYTHING to dim the PAIN
The doc says it’s a MIGRAINE

Liar! Deceiver! Phony! Faker!
You need someone to be your caretaker!

I’ve tried EVERYTHING to no avail
Sometimes I sit and WEEP and WAIL
DEATH would be so welcome now
For my kids’ sake I’ll GO ON somehow

Backstory

When I wrote this in 1992, it was after having suffered for years from chronic migraines. Explaining
the pain and other symptoms of a migraine to friends and family was nearly impossible. Most,
including my wife, said the pain couldn’t be as bad as all that. I wrote this poem then describing
what happened during these episodes, along with the remarks I got. A few years ago, I found a song
online by singer/songwriter Allie Sealey. She is a fellow migraine sufferer, and she really
describes it so well in her song, “Not All in Our Heads”. I invite you to check out her YouTube
video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LeiXSyClmME.