The Bidet

Copyright ©2023 John Wm Beckner - All Rights Reserved

In the realm of porcelain thrones we roam,
A humble add-on, finds its home,
A bidet, a wonder, a secret delight,
Oh, how could we ever do without its might?

From that first woo-hoo moment, a revelation so sweet,
A stream of cleansing water, a welcome retreat,
No more reliance on tissue, no rough paper's grace,
The bidet whispers softly, "I'll take your place."

It's a friend in the bathroom, a companion so dear,
A spray of refreshment, a cleansing frontier,
With a twist of the knob and a gentle embrace,
It washes with care, leaving nothing to trace.

But oh, the funny times, the moments of grace,
When you're showing a friend, with a grin on your face,
How this marvelous contraption does its fine work,
And suddenly, whoosh! You're the one feeling a jerk.

A surprise in the face, an unexpected spray,
Laughter erupts, as you both reel away,
In the midst of the chaos, you can't help but see,
The bidet's a jester, as mischievous as can be.

Yet through all the giggles, the laughter, the jest,
It's clear that this marvel is truly the best,
For the wonders it brings to our daily routine,
Make the bidet a treasure, a bathroom dream.

So, let's celebrate the bidet with a cheer,
For it banishes discomfort and keeps us in the clear,
From that first woo-hoo moment, we never doubt,
The bidet's a gem we can't do without.


9/11/23 We installed bidets for several of our tenants and the poem reflects their interactions. 😊